After losing their 941st consecutive regular season game to the Red Sox, fiery Angels manager Mike Scioscia walked mournfully into the locker room, tears misting in his eyes. "I don't want to see the Red Sox, I don't want to hear them, I don't want to smell them, I don't want them in my presence," he said forcefully. "I want them to go away forever. We can't beat them...ever. Let me come out and say it: the Red Sox are our daddy."
Terry Francona sympathized with his fellow skipper. "I think Sciosc might be taking it too hard a little bit," Francona said. "That said, I wouldn't mind playing those guys every night. They find ways to lose games. I'll tell ya, it's a helluva lotta fun beating those guys."
Team psychopath Torii Hunter paced the locker room, punching walls and screaming at the Red Sox fans in this head. "Call them my daddy and my mommy," he yelled. "Just get them out of my head, before I go in there with a hammer."
