A surprisingly frank Terry Francona addressed the Red Sox players last night after another demoralizing loss to a supposedly weak team, and delivered a message designed to take the pressure off his straining players.
"I decided some honesty would help a little bit," Francona told the media. "I basically explained to them that if you look at the statistics on our record and our start--and you know the little twerps in the front office love those stats--we're totally screwed."
It was mentioned to Francona that that was not exactly an encouraging message. "I think it will take the pressure off a little bit," he explained. "Our season is over, we're out of it already, so let's put all the pressure aside, have some fun, and try at least to stay out of the A.L. East cellar."
The players had mixed reactions. "It really picked up my spirits," said a sarcastic Dustin Pedroia. "I mean, what player wouldn't be happy knowing that the season is over after 11 games?"
High-priced disaster Carl Crawford, however, was ecstatic. "It's tough being as god-awful as I've been when your team is trying to win it all," he reasoned. "Now that we've accepted how bad we are, I can start trying to hit the ball."
