To most of the sporting world, the news that Sammy Sosa tested postive for performance-enhancing drugs was hardly earth-shattering news. In fact, it was greeted with a collective "Ya think?" But confirmed steroid cheaters Manny Ramirez and Alex Rodriguez both reacted with shock yesterday when the news was relayed.
"Oh, man, lemme tell you, I didn't see that one coming at all, dude," Ramirez said, with a forced look of astonishment, while enjoying a Donald Duck festival on the Cartoon Channel. "Sammy? Man, there were no signs of that at all! No big muscles, no big rise in homeruns, and no huge head. I can't believe it, man. Just when you think you know a guy, huh?""
ARod also expressed his astonishment. "As you know, I had just a brief dalliance with these substances," he said. "It was part of a lifelong battle I've had with testosterone. But, my goodness, I was shocked to hear about Sammy, although I hardly know the man and have never seen him in person." ARod is known as a close friend of Sosa's, and has played against him several times.
"I can't believe all that's happened with these steroids, dude, it makes me sad," Ramirez lamented. "I mean, Sammy had that great homerun race with McGwire, everyone loved it. Next thing you know, people are gonna be accusing McGwire of using steroids!"
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