For most, it’s a meaningless exhibition game, a traditional way to start off Spring Training and to give local college kids the once-in-a-lifetime chance to compete against the hometown team. But listen to hyperactive, ultra-competitive Terry Francona, the opening Spring Training game against Boston College will set the tone for the entire season, and the nervous manager is feeling the pressure.
“We gotta win that game, fellas, lemme tell ya’,” Francona told the assembled media yesterday. “I been scouting them for weeks, watching video, studying all their tendencies. I know those kids better than my own kids. They’re tough as hell, and if we’re not completely on our game, we’re gonna get our butts handed to us. I might have Beckett go nine innings.”
When apprised, Theo Epstein shook his head. “If Josh goes more than two innings for any early Spring Training game, Terry will be the first managerial casualty of the year,” the GM said. “On average, we’ve beaten Boston College by 15 runs, not that I give a rat’s ass about the game. We’ve just gotta get Tito calmed down. He goes through intense baseball withdrawal during the offseason.”
“If Jacoby gets on, he’s gonna steal second and third, and then we’ll squeeze him in,” Francona speculated, as the bored media walked away. “We gotta get ahead of the Eagles early or we’re in trouble. The tape shows they’re tough to come back on. Holy Cross fell behind 1-0 on ‘em, and never had a chance after that.”
bill@callofthegreenmonster.com